I am not new to the whole “dating” thing...in
fact, I like to think of myself as someone who has seen their fair share of
dates and boyfriends. I am not a stranger to sex...I happen to think that sex
is one of the best "activities” between a man and a woman, romantic or
not.
However,
I will point out to you that dating in the 21st century is fucked up. Women are
too easy, men are repulsive, and nobody believes in monogamy anymore; except
me...I think I am the only one who believes monogamy is beautiful and is
something to be cherished.
As
I said, I am not new to dating and I have had my fair share of dates because I
SUCK at dating. Surprised? I am not...dating is hard, especially now that we
have the Internet and nobody meets organically anymore, that would be too
convenient. We now have dating web-sites like OkCupid, Match, and eHarmony. You
can even go on a dating web site for your personal preference...ever heard of
Blackpeoplemeet.com? How about Militarycupid? What about Farmersmeet.com? That
just scratches the surface. Technology even has apps now; for example, are you
looking to just have a no strings attached midnight rendezvous with someone you
don't know? Try Tinder. Looking to get a dick pic from a 15 year old? Go to
Kik...
I
can say with all honesty, I have tried, WHOLE-HEARTEDLY 90% of those web sites
and apps...all with no prevail. So here it goes...this is the story of a
twenty-something dating in the 21st century.
My
childhood was normal. I grew up Catholic, and I was even an alter server until
I got into middle school when I changed schools from a Catholic school to a
public school.
In Catholic school, however, is when I had my
first kiss...his name was Enrico...a lot of my friends and I were playing
"boys chase girls", however the rules were when the boys catch the
girls they had to kiss them. I was in first grade and in Catholic
school...quite the little 6 years old wasn't I!
Because
my parents grew up Catholic, I was told early on, mostly in middle school that
I was not allowed to have a boyfriend until I was sixteen. So without further a
due, let's go through my high school “lovers”
My first official boyfriend was Joseph. He was younger than me by a
year, however we were in the same grade. (I was held back in school) I lost my
virginity to him, but not until we dated a while, about 10 months. Here's the
kicker...my first relationship ended because he lied to me for the ENTIRE time
we were dating...all three years. What was he lying about? Drugs...I am against
all drugs and smoking; Joseph knew this from the beginning. So the whole three
years we were together, he was doing drugs behind my back. I was pretty naive
though...when I would ask him why he smelled like smoke, he would tell me that
it was because he got a ride from his friend Josh who was smoking in the car on
the way to school...and I believed it. Was I an idiot for believing him? Yes.
Does that mean that it doesn't hurt when you realize they have been lying? No, but it was still partially my fault for being nieve and for him being a douche and lying the whole time.
My second
VERY SHORT fling was with a man named Frank...we met on OkCupid. This was the
summer before I left for college. We dated the whole summer. We were intimate
after about a month. A few times I would go to his place and there would always
be a little boy there...and his name was Frank. I gave [my] Frank the benefit
of the doubt when he told me that it was his nephew. A few days later I learn that his nephew "Frank" is actually his son...Who the heck lies about if they have a child or not? Don't you think
that is an important aspect when forming a relationship? I ended up breaking up with him and I never talked to
Frank again, nor did I ever see him again. He now works for Microsoft in Seattle Washington. So Frank ended up being the start of an awful, and still ongoing battle of trying to find a guy who isn't a jerk, liar, or scumbag.
Stay tuned to hear the college years stories! You don't want to miss those!
